(Warning: Tonight's blog has a rude word indeed contained therein. It's not one I personally use, but it's still in there.)

Acrochallenge!

Hello, hello. And don't you all look pretty today, sitting there with your Monday Faces on. I love you dearly.

Good acrochallenge this week, and it starts with a few words about the great Crisp.

Crisp is my buddy from #squeeze, although he isn't there nearly as often as he should be. He's a warm, wry, witty, and kind guy. He also has a wonderful wife and cutie-pie daughter. And sometimes he says things that just make me double over with laughter.

Thursday night in #squeeze Crisp appeared to deliver what is undoubtedly the Quote of the Year for 2005. (This man is no stranger to the Tremendous Quote: it was Mr Crispi who delivered the line, "...And off we went on a roller coaster ride of hate!" that ended up on the #squeeze t-shirts.) It came when we were talking about none other than that Big Testimonial to Craziness Himself, Tom Cruise:

I've always liked the story about Jools Holland writing "I am a cunt" on John Cale's forehead while he slept. If I could do that to any one human being, it would be Tom Cruise. Even over Hitler.

I love it; and what's not to love? Is there anyone out there right now more annoying than Tom Cruise? Have you actually seen the man on anything lately? He's a raving lunatic! He's jumping up and down and falling in love and kissing all over this woman and spouting Scientology rhetoric and condemning the psychiatric community and fighting with Matt Lauer - the man's just a walking Fruit Loop Factory. And an annoying one at that.

(BTW, I saw the Matt Lauer interview, and I mean it folks, this man's a raving fruitcake. I almost expected "Senor Pepe" to come out. And he also went on a tirade about how gossip didn't bother him because there were always going to be people out there to say things like his current "romance" is a publicity stunt. Oh, really, Tom? If it doesn't bother you, why, when anyone breathes the first letter of the word "gay" in connection with your name, do you sue the pants off anyone who happens to be standing around at the time?)

Anyway, enough of my soapbox preaching. Our acrotopic is "Oh, That Tom Cruise."

The rules are the same. Everyone gets 3 entries each to come up with the best acronym possible that not only matches the topic, but also the letters below, from Mr Acrobasket, who roundly stood behind Nicole Kidman through all that unpleasantness. He would, though. Then tomorrow night at, say, 10pm est (or later, I'll be on the road, band concert) I shall be announcing the winners, who actually get to write the offending note and stick it on Cruise's head. And the rest of us will go write one and stick it on Hitler's.

So the topic is "Oh, That Tom Cruise." The letters:

J T E S P

Let the acroing begin! "Even over Hitler." Now that's funny....

Betland's Olympic Update:
* Boy, did I have a life-changing realization recently. For over 3 years I've been writing in this very blog about being one, and yet, I've been spelling it wrong. I truly never knew till within the past week or so that it's "curmudgeon" and not "crumudgeon." Well, color me embarrassed. So to anyone who finds an archive with it misspelled, you'll just have to forgive me, I'm afraid. And hey, all you smart guys - why didn't anyone correct me?
* That #squeeze chat that produced Quote of the Year also produced a gem from Stennie: "I wish I had a Hoveround so I could go to the Grand Canyon."