Milo News and Notes (Brrrf!)

Hello. I'm sitting here with nothing much to say, so I thought I'd give you a little update on my boy. Milo. Milo, who's probably having trouble learning his name because along with Milo I also call him Dippy Dog, Doggie Dude, Boo, Mr Bibbibbibbibbb (an "Auntie Mame" reference, that), Mr Thing, Mr Wonderful, Babybabebabe, Moon Pie, Sweetheart, Cuteface, and the occasional Taylor. I have no idea why I find myself calling the dog by the Nephew's name. I'm old. It's OK - Mr M sometimes slips and calls him Alice.

Well, I'll be boarding Doggie Dude again next weekend, when Mr M and I go off on another jaunt. A jaunt after which I'll come home to a whole week's vacation. I can't wait. The Tuesday of that week will be the first Hi-D-Ho Academy obedience class, but the first class is for people only. Orientation, I guess, where we hear all about how if anything goes wrong it's our fault and we'd better be prepared to accept the blame. That and tuition paying.

As I mentioned in last night's blog, Babybabebabe had a fun-filled evening Saturday while I was at Oktoberfest. There's no way he could have jumped that gate into the dennette, I'm now thinking he climbed it. It has little openings in it. Anyway, I'm still amazed he was such a good boy, with nary a pee nor poo, and all my wires seem to be intact.

Sunday morning I watched the clip on CBS Sunday Morning about Bill Geist getting his first-ever dog, and if you didn't follow the link on last night's Olympic Update, here it is again. You really should watch it, but in case you're not up for it, I'll give you the punch line. The puppy Mr Geist adopts - it's Mr Thing! Well, it's Miss Thing. A female, named Daphne, who looks so much like Milo I screamed aloud when she made her first appearance in the segment. Three different people (Mr M, Stennie, and my sister) told me I should send Mr Geist a picture of Milo, and so you know what? I did! Along with a nice note telling him how much I enjoyed his piece.

I've decided that if Mr Wonderful has a purpose in life - you know, some dogs are meant to be hospital visitors, cheering the sick, some are meant to be rescue dogs, digging through rubble for survivors - that Milo's purpose is to find lost socks for everyone on earth. This dog is absolutely crazy for socks. I hide them in my bedroom so he won't carry them away, and he finds every single one. And sometimes I'll miss him a few minutes, and when he finally reappears he's found a lone sock I'd given up on finding long ago. Maybe he could be a rescue dog digging through the rubble if the survivors beneath take off their shoes.

Our favorite morning game is "Shoe Time." I sit on the bed with my shoes and socks, and he attacks my feet and my socks while I'm trying to put them on. Then he attacks my shoes and shoelaces.

Tonight, however, Mr Bibbibbibbibbb dispensed with the sock finding and was gone a few minutes, turning up dragging my Sauerkraut Band dirndl into the living room. The whole thing - dress, blouse, and apron. He's very talented.

Also tonight, Cuteface gave me a fat lip. No, he wasn't mad at me, we were playing and it was a classic case of "his head, my mouth." But my lip is all swollen. No big deal, but funny.

Two of my favorite Taylor (the dog, not the nephew) things involve his crate. The first is that this puppy is so good, all I have to do is go to the crate with a treat and he comes to me, stands there while I take off his leash, then he walks into the crate and turns around, waiting for his treat, praise, and pat on the head. The other happens on Friday and Saturday nights, when I'm usually up later than the other nights. I'll be happily playing around here on the computer, and Milo will go in the kitchen, get his pink blankie out of his crate, and carry it into the dennette. Then he'll bunch it up and lay on it a while. Then he'll go get his blue blankie from the crate, carry it in too, and bunch it up and lay on it. Like, "Hey, you're obviously not putting me to bed, and I'm getting sleepy here."

Oh, and I've been practicing the clarinet a little at home, and Moon Pie loves to climb up on the couch beside me and howl. Now see, this unnerves Mr M to no end when it happens at his house, he gets mad and yells, but I think it's funny. I don't yell, I laugh, and eventually he stops. But I've figured out middle E-flat is his favorite howling note. It's his tuning note.

Oh! Last week I bought Dippy Dog a new toy. See, he has a squeaky cupcake that he just loves. It's hard and chewy, and he just lays on his back and puts it between his front paws and chews on it. It's also very realistic - it makes me want a cupcake. Well, last week I bought him a squeaky donut made by the same company. Nice and realistic, it's a chocolate-covered with white icing on it. I gave it to him and he went nuts, running around the house squeaking it.

Later that very evening, I noticed him playing with something, well, chewing on something, and it wasn't squeaking, so I got nervous. I figured he'd found something, perhaps a sock, that he wasn't supposed to have. I got up to get a closer look, and he had - eaten his donut. Completely eaten the top part of it. He ate the icing off it. It wasn't pleasant the next morning at poo time.

Ah, the times we have. Milo's a sweetie. He's a good doggie.

Betland's Olympic Update:
* Acrowinners, we have acrowinners! So, it was one of those days? Tell me.
- Honorable Mentions go to Marla (marlamarla), with her "Annoying Discussions About Boys' Orgasms In Stereo," and LilyG, with her "Ate dirt, angered boss, oh,it's shitty."
- Runner-Up goes to Kellie (with an ie), with her "Ate. Diarrhea. A Bus. Onboard, I Stressed." That cracked me up.
- However, this week's winner goes to Patrick (my little love), and now, I have to say it's not fair to the others. He had more than three entries, but they all combined to make such a "one of those days" it was amazing. My fault lies in not making the contest one where all three entries combine to make the worst day. But Patrick did it, and he wins. His day? "Actually, days are better over icy Stroh's. After dinner, Andy broke out in song. And Dumb Alice bitched out Isaac's sister. Also, Dave agreed, Bill Overmeyer is stupid. (Any drink a buddy overlooked, I stole.)" Now that's brilliant.
- Thanks to all who played, you've all done very well!